Forum Fun & Crazy Moments Joke Corner
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Klaus Betke 06.03.2021, 13:31 #1

Joke Corner

Nothing that makes you sad, but maybe something to think about :-)
You just can’t trust anything anymore.
I went to the pharmacy today and, after a long consultation, bought some motion sickness tablets.
Once I got home, I took five right away.
The result: spent money, wasted time, and I’m still sitting at home.
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Andreas Bibas 07.03.2021, 11:44 #3
"What does this number mean?" the teacher asks, writing on the board: X X I I.
Oli, the pub owner’s son, raises his hand: "Two beers and two shots!"
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Klaus Betke 07.03.2021, 13:05 #4
Attention Important Notice

During the Corona pandemic, Google also requires a search box to be displayed on the screen.
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Andreas Bibas 13.03.2021, 12:10 #5
Did you know that distant relatives can be great, but it’s actually forbidden to remove them yourself?
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Frank Weller 27.11.2021, 23:09 #6
@Andreas Bibas Distant relatives can sometimes be better than those who visit and get on your nerves.
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Frank Weller 13.12.2021, 22:14 #7
At Montparnasse Station in Paris, two Jewish men are standing at the ticket counter. When it’s their turn, they buy a single ticket for the night express to Madrid. Two Spaniards nearby notice this and wonder why they only purchase one ticket.
The train pulls into the platform, all passengers board, and the train departs.
About half an hour later, the conductor comes through the carriage, and the two Jewish men get up and disappear into the restroom.
As the conductor passes by the restroom, he knocks on the door and calls out, “Tickets, please.”
A ticket is slid under the door, which the conductor tears off and slides back.
The two Spaniards watch this closely.

A few days later, the two Spaniards are at the Madrid station, buying a ticket for the night train back to Paris.
The two Jewish men are there again but don’t buy any tickets.
Same scenario: the train departs. After a few minutes, the conductor comes into view, and the two Spaniards disappear into the restroom. Meanwhile, the two Jewish men stand up, approach the restroom door, knock, and call out, “Tickets, please.”
A ticket is slid under the door. One of the Jewish men grabs it, and they both disappear with the ticket.
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Frank Weller 17.12.2021, 16:38 #9
@Heinz Licht Dear Heinz, this joke comes from a collection of Jewish jokes compiled by a French Jew. I don’t see anything racist about it at all. It’s more about the cleverness that a German might initially lack. However, we should be careful not to label everything immediately. Not every Jewish joke is inherently racist, and not every AfD voter is automatically a Nazi.
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Andreas Bibas 20.02.2022, 17:58 #10
The teacher asks Paulchen, "What is half of six?" to which Paulchen replies, "half past five."
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Bernd Tiemann 17.08.2022, 14:14 #11
I’ve got a joke about Deutsche Bahn.
But I’m not sure if it’ll arrive on time.1f602.png
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Georg Bein 18.08.2022, 11:06 #12
"Why does the airplane have a propeller?" the teacher asks.

"So the pilot doesn’t sweat," replies little Fritz.

"That’s nonsense, that’s completely wrong," the teacher says.

"Funny you say that," Fritz responds, "I once saw a plane lose its propeller. You should have seen how much the pilot was sweating then."
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asterix o 02.10.2022, 09:48 #13
No jokes for over a month! Maybe it’s because we’re too caught up in photography?

The other day, a wife was complaining to her friend, “My husband is always obsessed with his crazy photography. Yesterday, I packed my bags and moved out.”
“And how did he take it?”
“With a wide-angle lens, flash, and f/5.6 aperture.”

Trying to make it fully gender-neutral makes it a bit awkward, so maybe next time with the roles reversed;
Wishing you all a great day!
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Erich Kremer 22.12.2025, 21:38 #14
I believe we should also use Christmas as an opportunity to practice more mindfulness.
Because when we are fully present, we can consciously perceive our surroundings and be mindful.

Let’s start practicing with simple everyday things.

OH, look, an espresso machine, how lovely!

or

OH, what an ugly child, can we get rid of them?

Mindfulness is important in life!
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Katja Harder 23.12.2025, 15:00 #15
What do you call a cowboy without a horse? — A saddle carrier
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Andreas Bibas 20.01.2026, 16:57 #16
"My husband has asthma." "And you can make a living from that?"
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Andreas Bibas 20.01.2026, 17:00 #17
"Hello, police. My Chihuahua has been stolen." "So, a classified ad!"

I wanted to buy a tree today. So I went into the store, and the salesperson told me I needed to go to the main branch—they’re just a satellite location.
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Andreas Bibas 21.01.2026, 11:35 #18
Woman: "Do these pants make me look fat?" Man: "No idea, but I wouldn’t eat them myself.

" Police officer: "Is that water in the bottle?" Me: "Of course!" Officer sniffs it: "That’s WINE!" Me: "Oh God, Jesus has done it again..."
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Leo Rothner 21.01.2026, 13:48 #19
Why does a newborn farmer’s child always receive two bricks as a gift?

They place both bricks on the child’s chest so they learn to grunt early on!
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Wolfram Damies 21.01.2026, 15:29 #21
A sailor writes a letter to his mother:

Dear Mom, while I was away at sea, my wife gave birth to a boy. Since she didn’t have enough milk to nurse him, the baby was breastfed by a wet nurse with an immigrant background. Because of that, unfortunately, the child turned out completely black.

The mother replies:

Dear boy, I had the same problem with you back then. However, we used cow’s milk. That’s why you turned out to be the biggest cattle beast of all time.
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Andreas Bibas 23.01.2026, 10:22 #22
Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "The love of your life." "No way! Beer can't talk!"
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Katja Harder 23.01.2026, 14:45 #23
What do you call a heavy vegetarian? - A compost bin.
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Katja Harder 23.01.2026, 14:45 #24
What do you call a heavy vegetarian? Compost bin.
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Katja Harder 23.01.2026, 14:46 #25
What do you call a overweight vegetarian? - Compost bin
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Katja Harder 23.01.2026, 14:46 #26
What do you call a overweight vegetarian? Compost bin
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Katja Harder 23.01.2026, 14:46 #27
What do you call a chubby vegetarian? Compost bin
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Andreas Bibas 24.01.2026, 10:54 #28
The biology teacher addresses the class: "Who can name 6 animals that live in Australia?" Marie raises her hand: "A koala and five kangaroos."
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Andreas Bibas 24.01.2026, 10:55 #29
What's the difference between a bra and a sweater? One provides support, the other just makes promises.
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Andreas Bibas 24.01.2026, 10:58 #30
“Come on, hurry up!” Julchen urges her friend Steffi. “My mom gets really angry if I’m not home from school on time.” “I wish I had it that good. My mom just puts something cold in front of me.”
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